What the 4th of July Means to Me

 Well~  This sums up a bit of it, quite well.  I posted it a year ago:

"4th of July time has to be equal in regard to family togetherness as Christmas is! I just love this time of year, in spite of the oppressive heat! I love seeing on my newsfeed that y'all are visiting your families. I love knowing that I will spend time with MY family, with my Sjoberg family, and this year even with my Smith family! (That can be confusing - I am NOW a Smith, but I actually come from Smiths. ~Disturbing, isn't it!!!) I love the picnics & the swimming & the parade & the fireworks. I love knowing I will be at EHBC this Sunday! 4th of July time is all about our country & our families. There are a lot of patriotic holidays. I'm acutely aware of them as they each pass. But I think I'll choose the 4th of July as one to think about the difficulties of the families who have been left behind due to a loved one giving his life in service for our country. Here we are ~in Carmel or in Hodgdon, Maine~ excited for sparklers & watermelon & time with cousins, truly blessed to live in the USA, thankful for the rich heritage given to us in both our country & our family. We should not allow this holiday time to pass without thanking God for our country, without reaching out to those who have given dearly to our country. Perhaps it means watching Saving Private Ryan or perhaps it means having a conversation with your kids or perhaps it means writing a letter. For me, I will be spending time with my family. My Family. In my Free Country. My dear sister-in-law & her dear family, who lost James. I get to be with my family & they don't get to be with him. My family who lost their nephew, Aaron. The loss is SO great & it seems even more unfair on a patriotic & family-oriented holiday. I don't have the words. The sacrifice is great. The pain is deep. '...It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.' " 

That says how I feel about as concisely as I know how.  
Even so... I will elaborate.

My grandmother, born in 1918, was very patriotic.  (My grandfather may have been as well, and although I have many memories of him, he went to heaven when I was 12 years old, so I don't have any specific memories of his patriotism!!  However, I was in my upper 30's when my Gram died so I had many more years to observe her patriotism!)  My grandmother served in the WAVES during WWII and my grandfather was in the army.  I wish that I knew more about his personal story of being a WWII soldier.  On this same side of the family I have one uncle who served in the military and two cousins.  

For the very purpose of the 4th of July, Independence Day, the approval of the Declaration of Independence, and for the added reason that I come with a heritage of patriotism, clearly & obviously, the 4th of July means Our Country to me.  The United States of America.  We express our love for our country with the colors red, white, and blue.  Flags.  Parades.  Fireworks.  Maybe singing.  Prayer.  Thanksgiving.  We read books about our country.  We learn the history of our country.  We may talk to our kids about our duties as Americans.  Pastors preach sermons about America & citizenship.  Families watch movies about America.  

 

Celebrating patriotic holidays makes me think about what I remember about my Social Studies and History classes in school.  (I guarantee you that a lot more information was presented than I remember now, as a nearly 40-year old!!)  One year of high school was World History.  (Thumbs down on that year for me.  I didn't like it.)  My favorite teacher in high school was Little Fitz and he taught my favorite two classes:  Government & U.S. History.  Now, I assume that I had a 4th year of History in high school, but I have no recollection of what that was.  
When I was little I remember a bit about learning about Christopher Columbus 'discovering' America.  I think there was even some sort of drama presentation with costumes and songs.  

It has been said that Generation 'X'ers, (of which I am one), don't have any heroes.  That may be true.  I remember learning about Columbus in a way that came across as though he was good, maybe even kind-of 'all good.'  (These are 'big picture' sort of memories.  Nothing specific.)  Our founding fathers were good.  A lot of conservative Christians today say that nearly all of our founding fathers were good and upright and Christian.  It seems like in the past we expressed history as of course- for one thing, the winners.  We won independence from England so we can write our history in a way that reflects that.  We took over land from Native Americans and the history books from when I was young make that sound very different than it actually looked.

I have a problem with making people into heroes.  Inevitably it will come out that so-and-so had a moral failure & so-and-so cut out verses from his Bible that he didn't agree with and/or want to follow.  Time has a way of smoothing off these sharp & unpleasant character traits.  In today's world, especially today's Christian world, what would we think of a leader who had an adulterous affair with another man's wife, got her pregnant & had her husband killed?  Well, we know him as King David.  One of my almost-heroes is Rich Mullins.  His music speaks to me like nothing else.  However, he is not a 'perfect' guy.  He had a problems with women & with alcohol.  If I had him built up as a perfect guy in my head, that would kind-of all come crashing down when I found out things about him that are truly ugly.  

With my kids, I point out good characteristics in a person.  A good financial decision.  Kindness.  Compassion.  Smart choices.  Rather than saying a more global statement like, "Be like him!"  "Be like her!"  Recently we all watched 'Invictus' about Nelson Mandela and the South African rugby team.  It was inspiring.  Nelson Mandela showed forgiveness that is far above anything than I can even imagine.  In fact, both my husband and I have been able to practice better forgiveness since then, thanks to God & because of the inspiration of this movie.  So it's disappointing that Nelson Mandela had moral failures.  Broken marriages.  Unhappy children.  Same with watching Selma.  It makes you want MLK Jr. to be 'all good.'  But no one is all good.  

My point is that my understanding of America is rooted in being taught, at least some, a sort-of fictionalized view of America.  Not realistic.  So sometimes I'm a bit skeptical when I read something that seems very one-sided and quite tainted with bias.  It's also rooted in more realistic teaching during my teen & college years.  Learning not just about Colonial America but the Civil Rights Movement.  Harsher realities.  

I think we could look back at each time period of our history here in the U.S.A. and see near-heroes, truly quite good men, as well as some things and/or people that were very, very wrong.  In small ways & big ways.  On a family vacation we visited Shenandoah National Park in Virginia.  Absolutely beautiful.  But even the history of how that park came to be shows an ugly side of America.  

However, there is so much to love about our country.  The freedoms that we have had here are unprecedented.  While acknowledging that not all of our traditional American heroes have been 'good' guys & also acknowledging some truly evil and bad parts of our history, we can also acknowledge how amazing America is.  I am proud of the broad sense of America and of many of the specifics.  We have a lot of history that is remarkable and interesting.  There were a lot of people who have given much to make our country what it is.

 

We have never been able to travel a ton, because it requires money that we usually don't have.  However, we have been blessed to travel a lot more than others get a chance to.  For some of these travels we have chosen History-themed vacations:  In the past few years I've done the Freedom Trail in Boston twice, once with just Kevin & once with all 5 of us.  We've gone to Williamsburg & Yorktown & Jamestown.  These were tremendously enriching experiences.  4 years ago on a preteen mission trip that Kevin & I were leading we took our preteens to see Independence Hall in Philadelphia as well as the Betsy Ross house.  

So, the 4th of July makes me think of the 'Big Picture' history of America.  

It also makes me think of individuals.  

I grew up enjoying reading lots of historical fiction and many biographies, most centered around WWII.  It's easy to look at 'history'- history of anything, in terms of the 'Big Picture'.  It becomes more real when we see it as a picture of individual human beings.  

When James died in November of 2010 we were studying the Civil War in our homeschooling.  We used a lot of great picture books.  It became very hard to read those picture books.  My heart ached at the loss of every single individual.  9 months later is when we visited Yorktown.  An incoming hurricane cut our Yorktown visit short, but being in the fields of battle was overwhelming. The combination of patriotism, love of History, thoughts on the courage the soldiers had & sense of loss that war brings.  Brought silence.

So we think of individuals who have given so much for our country.

The 4th of July means, to me:

Patriotism, The United States of America, History, Individuals who have built into our country.  

It also means Traditions.

It means parades & special foods & patriotic clothing & fireworks & picnics, all taking place on hot July days. 

 

4th of July means spending time with FAMILY.
Every single 4th of July that I had, growing up, was spent going to the parade & going to my grandparents' farm, and ending in fireworks.  
So the afternoons meant playing with my Sjoberg cousins in the brook & in the barn & the orchard & later at my uncle & aunt's pool.  It meant homemade ice cream & treats & sun & heat & it means good, sweet memories for me.  

For my kids it has either meant Bangor or Hodgdon.  Whether just our family, or having a few friends over, or celebrating with Foster & Sjoberg families in Hodgdon, it has also meant FAMILY.  

To me, the 4th of July means:  My Country.  My Freedom.  My History.  My Past & My Future.  Traditions.  Family.  Food & Fun.  Parades & Fireworks.  Flags.  
LOVE.