An Honest Review of 'Unwrapping the Greatest Gift' by Ann Voskamp

I'm kind-of a shove-the-square-peg-into-the-round-hole kinda person sometimes.  #MustMakeItFit. (By the way, that quality is really only helpful when you work hard to make your marriage work, or are tenacious about something that needs to work- like a sport, or losing weight, or chores!)

This was our first Christmas season reading from Ann Voskamp's beautifully illustrated book, Unwrapping the Greatest Gift. We've read each day's reading.
 I didn't really like it!
 

This isn't like seeing Kirk Cameron's 'Saving Christmas' 'movie', (and I clearly use that term loosely).  I had wanted to like that, but I didn't even have to get half way through when I thought, "WHY did I pay to see this!?"  (Basically, it was a Sunday School lesson.  Not a movie!)  I knew right away that I didn't care for 'Saving Christmas.'  I was a bit more stubborn about trying to like Unwrapping the Greatest Gift.

Now- I don't hate it!  I may use it again!  But it is far from a great children's resource, in my opinion.  I'm writing my review because I would hate to have a parent make a real effort toward devotions, trying to making their home the primary place where faith is nurtured, only to have a poor experience with this particular resource, and to give up entirely.  

I believe I am in the minority in not particularly caring for this book.  And by all means, if this book works for your family, helps you celebrate Christ in Christmas & draws you close to Him, that is exciting!  For me, I had never even heard of a Jesse Tree until recently.  I researched it and found it's a Catholic tradition.  However, my husband and mother-in-law had never heard of it either. 

Last year, on Facebook, two of my dear friends posted a lot about Voskamp's Unwrapping the Greatest Gift.  Based on these postings I had the impression it was a book for children, (Based on her book for adults, The Greatest Gift), perhaps even quite young children.  Well, I happen to know & believe that great children's books aren't just for children.  So at an after-Christmas sale I bought three:  One for us, and one for each of my brothers, who have small children.  I love family devotions.  I love books.  I love children's books.  I love Jesus coming to earth.  I love traditions.  I was excited to try out this book for Christmas 2015. 

I love the concept of this book, I just don't happen to love it.  The wording is clumsy and not easy to absorb or even read aloud.  (As someone who has read many, many books aloud, this style did not lend itself well to that.)  I would be surprised if young children can even understand much of it, much less absorb it, which is the whole point.  The sentences were complicated and long.  If I tried this book with young children, I would find myself altering it and shortening it greatly, making it almost unrecognizable.  I'm not sure that much of it 'jumped off the page' for my children, who are 12 & 14 years old.  Some parts did for me, when I was the one reading it, and could re-read sentences that were wordy & required me to fully focus and figure out what was being said.  

I like:  "Your eyes were formed to be awed by the art of every wonder-laced snowflake and the carving of every swirl of frost and the sculpting of every cresting snowdrift.  And then to see it- God's own signature in the corner of everything."  As well as plenty of other parts.  But, in my opinion, it is not worded for most children.  (And my children have great comprehension & love to read.  Even so..)

I will say that Unwrapping the Greatest Gift has beautiful illustrations.  It's truly a gorgeous book.

I also like the whole idea of beginning with Creation.  The first time I remember hearing about this concept was the Firm Foundations curriculum by New Tribes Mission, and I thought it was a great idea.  Good Seed Publications puts out an adult book, On the Road to Emmaus, which is the same idea.  I do believe that everything points to Christ and I like reading Old Testament stories with this lens.  I like tracing Jesus' lineage.  I just wish the book were far simpler. 

I liken this book to kind-of putting me back at PCB in Dr. Toews' Poetics class, learning about A-lines & B-lines & meter & form & patterns.  I was a confused freshman in that class and I think it just caught me at the wrong time in my college life. 

Perhaps it's because poems and lyrical-style writing do not resonate with me.  Or at least, not at where I am in my current season of life.  To be clear:  Unwrapping the Greatest Gift is not a poem.  But the wording reminded me of a poem.  It is somewhat abstract.  And flowery.  And sometimes kind-of made-up or added to?? 

"The Son-King Jesus, who laid out the paths for all the stars, chose to fold Himself up small and lie in the space of Mary"  What?  First of all, the term 'Son-King' is used many times in  this book, but when read aloud sounds like 'Sun-King', which my children found odd.  

If you like it- great!  Just don't feel trapped and like you should like something, just because it seems like all of Christendom does.  I've seen several people recommend, instead of Unwrapping the Greatest Gift, using Sally Lloyd-Jones's Jesus Story Book Bible instead, even though it is not specifically an Advent themed book.  The writing, according to others, is better suited for children.

CHRIST in CHRISTmas. Ideas. Part 2

Part 1 is found here: http://carmelhillbillies.blogspot.com/2015/12/christ-in-christmas-sort-of-part-1.html
"Love Jesus the way He asks you to. Don't worry about the formulas or making Jesus part of the season too much. If Jesus is important to your heart, He will be foremost in the Advent/ Christmas season."

Part 2:  I asked friends, family & acquaintances about how they keep CHRIST in CHRISTmas.  Here are some ideas:

1. "Our church bought Advent devotionals, boughs, decorations & candles for each family to make their own Advent wreath.  This was the jump start that got us started on year-round devotions.  If we slacked off on devotions, the Advent wreath got us back on track each year."  I love this.  Yes, parents must have a vested interest, but I know in my own life I have benefited greatly from resources and nudges from others.
2. Have manger scenes be the focus of your Christmas decor, along with other pieces that point to Christ.  Some families have an expensive manger scene that they add a piece to each year.  (Oh, wouldn't I love a Willow Tree one!!)  Have at least one manger scene that children can play with.  Fisher-Price Little People set.  Homemade wooden blocks with figures painted on them.  Stuffed animal creche.  There are many options.  The goal is so that when someone enters your home they know Who is being celebrated. 
3. Read Luke 2.  This was mentioned a lot.  Other Scriptures too, including Isaiah's prophecies.  Many people responded that before presents could be opened, prayer was said & Luke 2 was read.
4. Giving.  Helping others is how we show the love of Christ.  Bake & give gifts to neighbors, friends & family.  Be intentional about getting to know neighbors.  Have the children make homemade cards for them.  Help those less fortunate.  Make a difference within your own community in a way that costs each person.  One teacher shared that instead of a classroom Christmas party, her class was donating to and volunteering at a food pantry.  (Great idea.)  Buy items for Samaritan's Purse & put a representation of these gifts under the tree.  Sacrifice your gifts to each other & instead donate that money to an organization such as Samaritan's Purse.  One mom came up with the idea of having a sign that said, "What Can I Give the King?"  From it hang pouches with the children's names on them.  When it is noticed that a child is making God's heart happy by being kind or unselfish, $1 goes in the pouch.  At Christmas, this money is used for Heifer International or another worthy organization.  Discuss what presents Jesus received & compare that to what we get today.  Put your manger scene under the tree because Christ's birth is the best gift of all.  Focus more on the giving than the receiving.  Emphasize that we have gifts because God gave us Jesus, (the Greatest Gift.)  Talk about the gifts we'd like to give Jesus this coming year:  Perhaps a better attitude, work ethic, more giving, less selfishness.  There are several versions of giving three gifts like the magi did.  Some children each receive three gifts on Christmas morning.  Some get three gifts:  One that they want, one that they need & one that will hep them grow spiritually or educationally.  For some families, because of work schedules or plans with extended family, the gift-giving is separate from Christmas, which helps get the focus off "us" and on to Christ. 
5. Christmas Eve service at church.  Christmas messages in the Sundays leading up to Christmas help prepare our hearts.  Attending a candlelight Christmas Ever service, no matter where you are, is meaningful.  Some people want a Christmas Eve service that will serve communion. In addition to the Christmas Eve service, children's Christmas programs are very meaningful and leave an impression on both those who participate and the audience.  
6. Christmas Carols & Songs.  Sung at church & in your home & listened to.  Caroling house to house or in nursing homes.
7. Advent Devotionals.  There are many, but several were mentioned by name:  Anne Hewitt advent cards which are progressive in their reading.  Unwrapping the Greatest Gift, (child or adult version), by Ann Voskamp.  What God Wants for Christmas, put out by Family Life.  Family Celebrations:  Meeting Christ in Your Holidays & Family Celebrations by Ann Hibbard, involving a reading, a hymn & an ornament.  Thriving Family devotionals.  Not a Silent Night by Adam Hamilton.  This idea was particular touching because the family has a college student away at school.  The student has a copy of the book & reads on her own & whenever she can she skypes with the family to have a group devotional time.  Many families are using their own.  A few verses each day.  For little children, children's books that tell the story of the 3 Trees, or the story of Mary, etc.  Last year our family had the theme of Jesus as the Light of the World.  We made candles & sang songs & read verses that were about that theme.  Before that we did the names of God.  'Ever Thine Home' sells themed ornaments and decorations.  Their new item this year is Jesus' name in many languages.  Several ideas involve a 'Creation to the Cross' family devotional and/or a Jesse Tree.  Typically in an Advent wreath, one candle is added every week.
8. One mom came up with one herself.  In fact, she had never heard of a Jesse Tree.  (I don't think I'm supposed to have 'favorites' among all the ideas I was given, but this may be it!)  "We do a mini tree with ornaments I made that represent stories chronologically in the Bible. We called it The Waiting Tree because since Adam people have waited for the Messiah to be born. Each day we told one story and hung that ornament on The Waiting Tree."
9. Birthday Cake for Jesus. 
10. Act out the Christmas story.  In your home.  At church.  In a pageant.  Go to live nativities & plays.  Do it with puppets, with toys.  Have your kids write and act out a version. 
11. Family activities, that sometimes go along with the devotional.  Baby Jesus & Advent- centered crafts. 
12. One creative mom made snowflakes to adhere to a tree, (red twigs in a Mason jar.)  Daily her family will write on a snowflake something that is true about God and put the snowflake on the tree. 
13. A couple of families mentioned adopting Jewish traditions.  One family has incorporated a menorah, to better understand the Jewish heritage that makes up the foundation of our faith.  One family is going to celebrate the Feast of Tabernacles next year, hopefully even building a booth in their yard, because their research shows that this is the time of year more likely to have been when Christ was born.  They anticipate joy at eliminating the distractions of Christmas-time and focusing on Him during the week long feast.  
14. One family has a Christmas tree with stuffed lambs under it, as a reminder that Jesus is the Lamb of God.
15. One family adds hay to a manger for 23 days and on the 24th day baby Jesus arrives in the manger.  
16. Being thankful.  Thankful for Jesus.  Thankful that we have been blessed by others.  Write thank you notes together as a family.  
17. Emphasize hope, peace, love & joy.  Lose the hype.  Keep it small, simple & sentimental.  Be intentional about making Christmas less commercial.  Don't get caught up in the rush and urgency.  
 

Even when Christ was not especially emphasized in homes, there was a general understanding that all of parties & the special food & the decorations & the presents- was happening because of a big spiritual event.  

Hope you've found an idea or two that resonates with you.

Merry Christmas!

CHRIST in CHRISTmas. Sort of. Part 1.

Her eyes immediately welled up with tears that spilled over.  She clenched her fists & with anger said, "No!  I don't have anything to do with Christmas!  It's just another day."

I had wished a housekeeper a 'Merry Christmas.'  I had volunteered for a Christmas morning shift and was trying to spread some cheer.  She sounded angry but what I saw was hurt.

Recently a tenant told me that he hated Christmas.  He hated the cold.  He hated going into debt because of obligations to buy gifts for people he doesn't care about.

A former co-worker was extremely excited at Black Friday time to scoop up all kinds of things for her teenage son.  This frenzy lasted up til Christmas and she frequently told me about what she had purchased:  The latest game consul & hundreds of dollars of games, expensive sneakers, the list went on & on.  In the New Year, this same co-worker was burdened with debt and complained and stressed about trying to pay off all that she had purchased for her son. 

These sentiments are not typical nor representative of most of the people I hang about with or know.  I perceive that my family, friends, and acquaintances on the whole love Christmas.  That is truly is the most wonderful time of the year.   

Even so, there can be no doubt that the Christmas experiences my children enjoy look quite different than the ones their grandparents enjoyed, (if they even did), and even different than my childhood ones.  The length of the season, points of interest & focus, special events, presents- these things shift with the decades.

Our first year of marriage my husband, 40+ years old, said to me, "My whole life I thought that Christmas was one day.  With you, it's a month long!"

Christmas itself can be confusing.  As a beloved character in Jelly Telly's 'Buck Denver:  Why Do We Call it Christmas?' asks, when told he can watch a Christmas DVD:  Which Christmas?  The one about Jesus or the one about Santa?  

And even in that, things can be confusing.  I personally did not grow up with an emphasis on Santa, nor did my children.  I never believed in him, but I did enjoy pretending about him.  Other Christians are even more strict about keeping Santa out of Christmas.  And yet, when my mom was a child, it was very common for a Santa to come to the church and be part of the celebration.
There are a lot of mixed messages.

As a 23-year-old I was boarding with a kind lady from church.  She introduced me to something I had never even heard of!  The 12 Days of Christmas!  (Now, yes, I knew the song.  But this was pre-wikipedia.  Had it occurred to me to be curious about the origins of the song, I would have had to tramp to the house of someone who owned an Encyclopedia, get the 'C' book off the shelf & perhaps I would have been more informed.  As it turned out, I was not curious.)  This was a perfect example of one deficit my non-denominational, New England background had given me:  A vacuum of liturgy.  Communal response & ritual were not part of my life & once I got past the 'Catholic-ness' of them, they became & still are a source of wonderment to me, dripping with meaning & symbolism, and although still not very much a part of my personal experience, very precious.

A few weeks ago, caught up in the whirl of Advent, I contacted a number of people, with the intent to write a post about ways to keep Christ in Christmas.  And I shall do that post, but this really isn't it.

The responses fell into a few categories, one being an uncertainty that the responder had anything meaningful to add.
Because Christ is Lord 365 days a year, not just at Christmas.  This low-key approach, these responses kind-of surprised me, slightly at least.  I have tried so hard to make this season memorable and deeply meaningful, alert to any and every thing that would point to Christ.So worried that Christ will be forgotten that sometimes things end up being forced and/or fake.

There is a calmness that comes with less striving.  This response is a good summary:  "... I think the most important part about teaching our children about Christmas is having Christ as the center of your heart and lives every day, not just at Christmas time. Each day we rejoice in the fact that we have been given salvation, grace and eternal live and help along the way, and Christmas is a special time to celebrate that. In our home, now and also when I grew up, we enjoyed the traditional Christmas things, the music, the movies of Rudolph and Santa Claus, but what is most important is teaching our children to give and to reflect on the true meaning of Christmas by teaching it at home, by attending Christmas programs at church that set our reflection on Christ and candlelight services singing Christmas carols of Jesus birth, sending Christmas cards that share scripture and Christ' birth."  

Another person mentioned family time and said, "Nothing super religious, but all very godly in that it draws us together and fills our love tanks in a godly way." 

I got to thinking.
How was Christ in the Christmas of my childhood?
Which led me to thinking about the Christmases of my childhood.  Our childhoods are so very important- crucial to who we become.  They can be overcome, but not easily.  It's quite possible that the tenant and housekeeper I spoke of in the beginning of this post, are carrying childhood hurts that haven't yet been resolved or healed.

What does Christmas mean for me?  What does it mean for my children?  What will they remember as the precious moments?  What did I, what do I love about Christmas?

I hadn't asked my friends these questions, but the answers to the one I did ask led me in that direction anyway.

Knowing that Christ was part of our daily lives, and fully knowing that Christ was central in Christmas,
For me, Christmas was:

• Family.  Every single Christmas of my childhood and almost every Christmas until I married my husband- afternoons and evenings were spent on the farm.  (Okay.  Kinda crying now!)  Yes, we got presents, yes we did a devotional & sometimes sang songs.  But it wasn't over-scheduled, (as can be my tendency.)  It was a big family meal for lunch.  Even better, snack-ier meal for supper.  Playing with cousins.  Rosettes.  Accordions & guitars. Simply magical.
• Music.  Playing records while decorating the tree.  Singing songs with family and at church.  Caroling.  
• Presents, (of course.)  Giving & Receiving.  Stockings.  Giving to neighbors.  
• Coziness.  Sitting by the Christmas tree with the lights.  Usually reading.
• Church Christmas Programs.  Memorizing our lines for a play and/or pieces and/or songs.  Sometimes costumes.  Oh, how I love a good Christmas program.
• Surprises.  
• The Tree.  Ornaments from Nancy.
• Word of Life Christmas productions.  I may have only been to one or two, but they were quite elaborate.  Plus, we had the records so I listened & memorized all the songs & parts. 
• School break!  Probably the downtime, although I perceived it very differently as a carefree child than I do now.  (I don't ever remember feeling very stressed about life!)
• Snow.  Most of the time.

 Christmas is:

• Family.  Our little unit & time with extended family, although never on Christmas.  The joy of my children & my husband.  Time together.  This 'Quality Time' Mama likes to ice skate, play games & watch movies with her family.
• Being intentional about Advent/ devotionals/ emphasizing the real meaning of Christmas.  
• Presents & Surprises.  How fun is it to surprise our children & loved ones.  To love on others- friends, neighbors & those less fortunate.  
• Christmas movies!  White Christmas.  The Homecoming.  Elf.  It's a Wonderful Life.  
• Coziness.  In our little corner of Carmel.
• Christmas Eve services.  
• The Tree.
• Our traditions:  Gingerbread houses.  Advent calendars.  Christmas cookies.  Operation Christmas Child shoeboxes. Giving our pets stockings.  Getting & decorating the tree.  Making gifts.  

I asked my children what Christmas means to them.
Noelle responded by asking me a question:  "Well, do you want to know which was my favorite?"  Her favorite is the Christmas that we didn't have gifts beyond stockings.  The Christmas that we 'gave away' our Christmas to Samaritan's Purse.  (See story here:  http://carmelhillbillies.blogspot.com/2013/11/operation-christmas-child-samaritans.html )  I have heard her mention multiple times that she wants her children to have Christmases where they don't receive anything.  This Christmas, she wants to pass out hot coffee to people in downtown Bangor.  That Christmas made a deep impression on all of us.

They mentioned the homemade cinnamon buns.  Movies.  Decorations.  The Cozy-Christmasy feeling you get when you are snuggled on the couch with hot chocolate.  The anticipation.

In a way, all these things point to Christ, in addition to being wholesome experiences and activities and items.  When we feel the belonging-ness of family, we know what it means to belong in God's family.  When we spend time together as a family, it teaches us that time spent with God draws us closer to Him.  When we give out of a heart of love, it's because He gave to us and showed us how to give & love.  When we excitedly anticipate Christmas, we reflect the joy & emotion of God, and we understand what it means to anticipate the 2nd Coming of Christ.

And for those to whom Christmas represents hurt.  Disappointment.  Pain.  We can do our best to show love, which is exactly what Christ did when He chose to be born of a virgin, into this hurting world, to show His love for us and rescuing us from forever disappointment & pain.

"Love Jesus the way He asks you to.  Don't worry about the formulas or making Jesus part of the season too much.  If Jesus is important to your heart, He will be foremost in the Advent/ Christmas season."  (from a friend.)