The Discipline of Faith - A Spiritual Life Post

The following was written by Lettie Cowman, who served with her husband, Charles, as a missionary from 1901-1917 in Japan & China:

"All things are possible to him who believes."  -Mark 9:23

The "everything" in this verse does not always come simply for the asking.  God is ever seeking to teach us the way of faith, and in our training in the faith life there must be room for the trial of faith, the discipline of faith, the patience of faith, the courage of faith, and often many stages are passed before we really realize what is the end of faith, namely, the victory of faith.  

Real moral fiber is developed through discipline of faith.  You have made your request of God, but the answer does not come.  What are you to do?

Keep on believing God's Word; never be moved away from it by what you see or feel, and thus as you stand steady, enlarged power and experience is being developed.  The fact of looking at the apparent contradiction as to God's Word & being unmoved from your position of faith make you stronger on every other line.  

Often God delays purposely, and the delay is just as much an answer to your prayer as is the fulfillment when it comes.  

In the lives of all the great Bible characters God worked thus.  Abraham, Moses & Elijah were not great in the beginning, but were made great through the discipline of their faith, and only then were they fitted for the positions to which God had called them.  

For example, in the case of Joseph whom the Lord was training for the throne of Egypt, it was not the prison life with its hard beds or poor food that tried him, but it was the word God had spoken into his heart in the early years concerning elevation and honor which were greater than his brethren were to receive.  It was this which was ever before him, when every step in his career made it seem more and more impossible of fulfillment.  These were hours that tried his soul, but also hours of spiritual growth and development.  

No amount of persecution tries like such experiences as these.  When God has spoken to his purpose to do, and yet the days go on and he does not do it, that is truly hard; but it is a discipline of faith that will bring us into a knowledge of God which would otherwise be impossible.  

-Taken from Minute Meditations for Women by Emilie Barnes

Chores - A Parenting Post

I actually don't care for using the terms "chores & duties" although I do use them!  I don't want to so fully separate "work" and "play" b/c I want my kids to see it just as "life."  Semantics?  Maybe.

When the kids were little I tried to include them in "helping", even if I knew that they really weren't helping that much!!  Folding towels & underwear, making beds, sweeping the floor, etc.

When Noelle was in K, (age 5), I purchased this wonderful "I did my chores" chore chart:

The following year I got married & I purchased one for D and one for Micah.  These charts were just PERFECT for that age.  They are designed to be self-directed, although I personally still did plenty of reminding.  They were a bit labor-intensive for me, b/c every night I would reset them for the following day.  There is a "morning" hook, a "noon" hook, an "afterschool" hook, a "nighttime" hook and an "extra" hook.  The kit comes with many plastic cards & stickers.  You can make your own chores, you can use some of their premade stickers or do as we did, some of both.  Once a chore is done, the card goes in the "I did it" box.

I would say that these chores were mostly what I would describe as taking care of your own stuff.

Put your clothes away

Pick up your toys

Do your homework

Study your AWANA

Feed your pet

Clear your plate

Brush your teeth

As they got older we did eventually add other things too.

During this time another mom really encouraged me with what she does with her family.  She has a wide range of kids.  They have to read 30 minutes every night, (they attend public school).  The kids pile wood and do all the dishes.  The mom has a lovely dishwasher, but she wants her kids to be contributing to the family, working together, and understanding the value of work.

By the way, I know that Dave Ramsey and other financial experts do not recommend giving kids allowances for "what they should be doing anyway."  In spite of that, we do give our kids allowances.  Currently they get $5/week.  D gets the same amount, even though she is not here as much.  10% goes to tithing and the rest is split - $2.25 for spending and $2.25 for savings.  They used to get $3/week, but I think we made the change to $5/week about 1.5-2 years ago.  Obviously, this is not a lot of money.  Sometimes they get money for their birthdays or Christmas, and that gives them more of a bulk to work with.  However, they have used this money to buy all their souvenirs they've purchased, gifts for each other, and fun things that they want to have.  This works for us.

I did start to feel, after awhile, that while the kids were doing a decent job of taking care of their own stuff - (we still have not arrived at this, at all) - we could do much better in getting them to help with family chores.

At one point I had the girls helping to clean the bathroom once/week, but I didn't stick with it.

So at least 8 months ago, but maybe more, we instituted some more chores:

~Micah is responsible for the downstairs bathroom trash & his trash from his room.  

~Denali & Noelle are responsible for the trash from their room & the upstairs bathroom.

~They each wash the dishes once/week, with the idea that the girls may do it twice/week, although that rarely happens.

I put together this simple chart:

I identified 3 things that if done daily would make a big difference:

1.  vacuum the black mats inside the door.

2.  sweep the porch, (poop, you know.)

3.  wipe down the downstairs bathroom sink with a Clorox wipe.

Generally speaking, those three things are done each day.

The girls have worked out a system for feeding the guinea pigs:

D every morning & on Sundays.

Noelle every evening & on Saturdays.

Micah & Noelle, because they are home most of the time, do a lot of other things too:

~Take the mail & get the mail

~Feed the chickens & collect the eggs

~Hang up laundry, fold laundry

~Every once in awhile cook a meal

My next thing to add, which I haven't had a lot of success with yet, is to have Noelle & D take turns dusting and sweeping their room.  Done just once/week, so every other weekend would be Noelle's turn, etc.  

(giving Clara a bath!)

When kids participate in chores which help the whole family:

~They take a greater ownership in their family & feel that their place in the family is valuable.

~They are more appreciative for what they do have.

~The home & world revolves less around them.

~They are developing their work ethic.

I would love tips from others on how they handle chores/jobs/duties.  We do not have this completely under control, but I feel that we've made some progress.  

Lastly, my friend, Jennifer Chiavelli, came up with this great idea for her kids:

Oh, the dailies - A Parenting Post

I am weary tonight.
Tonight I am homemaker weary, mom weary, wife weary.

If you are a wife, an employee, a husband, a father, a mother, a friend - a HUMAN (!!) - I'll bet that you get weary too!

And it's not really complaining, it's just saying honestly that at the end of this day I am weary...
... of cleaning things & washing things & sweeping places that seem to get dirty again so very soon after they were clean.
... of being the disciplinarian & praying about when to give grace & when to punish & when to ignore & when to hug & when to just let the fact that they don't want a hug brush off.
... from the dailies.  From changing several beds & doing several loads of laundry & cleaning up, (somewhat), and loading & unloading the dishwasher repeatedly & correcting papers & making crafts & cooking dinner.
... of summoning patience to be quiet when necessary & to encourage and soothe with grace & to listen to my talkative husband even when I am talked out for the day.
... from reminding about the guinea pigs, and the bunny, and to not put wet things on wood, and to please take a shower, and to not leave your bandaids in the tub, and to wash the dishes, ("yes, it is your turn.)
... of another day done with a full mind and a full heart, thinking of those I care about who are hurting & carrying some burdens, though they may be small.

"Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary." - Galatians 6:9

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For My yoke is easy and My burden is light." - Matthew 11:28-30

"For I satisfy the weary ones and refresh everyone who languishes." -Jeremiah 31:25

"The law of the Lord is perfect, restoring the soul."  -Psalm 19:7

"The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail.  They are new every morning."  -Lamentations 3:22-23

I rest securely in the fact that the Lord delights in me, weary or not.  He loves me, Oh - how He loves me.  I need not strive to gain His affection.  He leads me beside still waters & He restores my soul.  

Evening time is my still waters.
Bible time is the restoration of my soul.

And I shall greatly enjoy my peace.  And my sleep.  And wake up refreshed and ready to do it all again tomorrow.  Plus, I have a hint of something special my daughter has planned for me.  She has set her alarm for 6 a.m. and asked me not to get up 'til she gets me.  I have a pretty solid guess as to what she is up to.  It's good to be appreciated, but I'm thankful that even when I'm not, or when I'm weary about someone/something that is not going to change with a quiet evening & a good night's sleep, that those burdens roll off at the foot of Mount Calvary.

"..casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.." 1 Peter 5:7

Opinions, Opinions... - A Wendy/Parenting Post

This little post isn't about homeschooling or farming, but it is an "opinion" piece about parenting.  So, here it goes...

This is not a cloaked way for me to "talk" about a specific person.  I do not have anyone in mind, I am just stating my rather strong opinion about an area of parenting.  Truly.

I did not grow up in a perfect home, but I had a happy childhood.  I participated in oodles of extracurricular activities, probably more than I would let my kids participate in.  Of course my parents didn't live 30 minutes from everything either.  For sports, basketball was my sport, but I also tried out softball, soccer, track & even gymnastics in my pre-high school days.

Guess what?  My parents did not go to all my games.
Guess what?  This really, truly didn't bother me.  I knew they loved me.  I knew they were proud of me.  It never one single time occurred to me to ask them to come more.  It did not add to my security to have them there & it did not subtract from my security to not have them there.  

So, this is my first opinionated point:  I will not be attending all my child's activities.

Naturally, I am the transportation, and because I live a distance away from most activities, sometimes I do stay, because it doesn't make financial sense for me to drive home & back again.  Plus, I usually have my knitting with me!  However, more often than not, I run errands or get in some "alone" time.  I also completely understand that I don't have as driving a need to stay because I am with my children nearly all the time due to homeschooling.

Kevin took the time to go to D's track meet last week.  He ended up leaving early because her transportation situation changed.  Even so ~over an hour drive there and over an hour drive back and several hours there, all time out of his work day.  That is really something to consider that when you don't work, you don't get paid!  Yes, we think our children are worth it, that isn't really the issue.

So we do a lot of dropping off.... and picking up.... and arranging rides, when available.  I admit that I am somewhat baffled when parents are always-at-everything that their child is in.  I don't see it as wrong, it is just so far from my own thinking that I can't really relate.  I do feel that I am rather alone in this opinion though.  Society has shifted, because when I was a student I am quite sure that a lower percentage of parents attended all activities.

Second point of opinion:  I'm not going to buy my child everything that is offered/ everything they want/ all the add-ons...

I would love to have some other parents say to me, "We do the same thing!"  Not so much to validate what we do, although that is always nice, but to use as examples to show my kids that we are not the only ones!!  The reason I feel the need to do that is because it truly feels like we are the only ones!!

This came up last night and probably was the catalyst for this post.  We have the opportunity to order sweatshirts through D's track team.  One of the coaches contacted me, (this is not about the coach - she is very sweet), to double check whether or not we were buying one.
- We are not poor, but we certainly don't have a lot of $.  D does not need a sweatshirt.  She has several.
The coach told me that only 4-5 students are not getting the sweatshirts.  Well, quite frankly, Good for their parents!
It concerns me greatly that we are rearing a whole generation of kids who have no vested interest in their belongings, who don't have to sacrifice for something, don't have to wait for anything, don't know how to work hard to save for something.  (Those are sweeping generalizations that are not true of all, are not true all the time of most, but certainly are themes that I see.)

Noelle & Micah do dance.  That is their "sport", although they have also tried basketball, T-ball, soccer, skiing & wrestling.
I have never once bought Noelle flowers to give her after a recital.
I don't take pride in this, although I realize it might sound like I do.
For us, it started very young.  When my kids were young I noticed that seemingly everywhere we went they were offering kids something:
Free popcorn at Target
Stickers at therapy
Cookies at the bakery
A slice of cheese at the deli
Lollipops at the bank

I made a conscious, intentional decision that I was only going to allow my kids to have these things sometimes.  I personally did not think it was healthy for them to think they should get something every time it was offered, every time it was available.  Self-restraint and self-denial are good things to cultivate.  So yes, I was that mom who let my child have the free cookie about once/ month.  I am still that mom who more often than not says "no" to the lollipop at the bank.  I was that mom who suggested we save the sticker for an Operation Christmas Child box.

At dance they offer T-shirts, DVDs, pictures, flowers ~ Sorry, kids.
Even as far as dance shoes & leotards are concerned, I buy the cheapest and most suitable.  Yes, this fits my budget, but also, I want my kids to know that it is not wise and often not possible to buy the best or their favorite.  This year Noelle needed a new leotard.  I admit that it was so tempting to me, sooo tempting, to buy something really pretty.  There were a lot of neat choices.  And it is not wrong for my child to have something pretty.  However, a modest, plain black one was the cheapest, and we were using money that Noelle earned selling lemonade.

D likes to ski and this year she had the time to go during February vacation.  Her birthday is in February and she received quite a chunk of money.  She wanted Kevin to go with her, so she was willing to pay for both of them to go, since that is the only way Kevin said he would go.  Good for her!

We buy some things.
Last year we bought D's gymnastics pictures & Noelle's dance pictures.
We buy a treat for each child the day of their recital.
We bought the kids each a T-shirt in Martha's Vineyard & also a T-shirt in Chincoteague.

Recently the kids started attending THRIVE at Bangor Baptist on Sunday nights, although that is now done until September.  For $2.50 they can get a bag of chips, a drink & a burger or pizza.  We decided that we would offer them $1.25 of that, if they wanted to eat at THRIVE, or they could eat our food for free.  They ended up deciding, for the most part, to just eat our food for free.

So, I am just sayin'.
We love our kids & they know that we love them.  They are not lacking in anything.  And we are choosing to be rather selective about what we provide for them.

East Hodgdon Bible Church - A Spiritual Life/Childhood Post

  This past weekend I made the trek home to Hodgdon in order to attend and give a little talk at the church I grew up in.  The theme was Lighthouses and based on Psalm 16:6 ~ Reflections of a goodly heritage.

"The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places;

indeed my heritage is beautiful to me."

Dear Amy & dear Heidi have also blogged about this, and I had the opportunity and privilege to hear Connie, Lynette, Jill, April & Robyn's thoughts too.  Here is what I shared, (approximately.):

I marvel at the "stats" of EHBC.  Marvel.  The % of young people who have been through this church and are now living for the Lord is amazing.  I'm sure most are aware that between 65-90% of young people who attend church regularly in their childhood leave after they graduate from high school.  That has not been the case here.

So, what is it about EHBC that has been successful/ is successful?  I think it's okay to use the word 'successful'.  Let's say that the goal is for a young person to grow up and become an adult who loves the Lord and is serving Him.  If that is a goal we have in mind than it is okay to say that EHBC has experienced success in this.

Micah at EHBC's 100th anniversary celebration last June

It is always good to have objectives.  I have "blessings"/objectives for my kids.  It's good to know what you're shooting for!  For example, with Micah, I pray nearly every night that he will "grow up to be a good, strong man who loves Jesus & serves Him his whole life long."  Micah knows this by heart & he knows it is what I'm hoping he will be as an adult.

So, back to the "success" of EHBC.  Obviously, I think the Word of God as a foundation is of utmost importance.  However, I have come up with three things that EHBC did that certainly helped them achieve success.

1.  EHBC carefully chose a few programs that fit the needs of the body.

AWANA is a classic example.  Our parents put SO much effort into AWANA!  It planted the seeds of God's Word in our hearts & minds.

2.  Children were and still are a priority at EHBC.

They are important.  They are allowed responsibility.  

~Collecting the pennies in "Opening Exercises"

~Teaching SS while I was still in high school, and then again in college & being allowed a Sunday night for that junior high class to share

~Faith Promise Pledge!  I remember as a very young child pledging the grand total of $3.  I put my offering in so that by the time a year was up I had given $3.  I'm sure my mom helped me keep track.  This allowance of my small gift began a lifetime of tithing and giving.

3.  Multi-Generational time together.  (This is probably my favorite!)

So often today elderly, singles, young marrieds, toddlers, teens - everyone is segregated into age groups.  We have so much to learn from one another!  I'm thankful that I spent so much time in the company of my parents' generation & my grandparents' generation.

~Uncle Glenn eating a donut off a string

~Sam driving his car on the ice

~Various "older" people sharing in church

I can no more extract the value of this time with older generations than I can extract just the flour out of cookies that have been baked.  The goodness of that has been baked into me!

Certainly all three of these things make for a healthy church, but back to my "stats" and marveling.  Many wonderful churches have done these things and have not experienced the success of EHBC.  I shall make a later point on the value of the home because I think that is where it is at!  

However, I think the "special sauce", the secret ingredient has been that there is no doubt that we at EHBC are reaping the benefits of seeds sown by past generations.  We do have a goodly/beautiful heritage.  

My great grandmother attended this church.

My Gram, born in 1918, grew up in this church.  

I wish I could spend some time with these people, from generations past, who paved a pleasant path for me.  

The Bible doesn't speak specifically about generational blessings.  It does, however, speak of generational curses, visited to the 3rd and 4th generations.  However, I think generational blessings aer implied.  Certainly, when we think of Abraham.  Psalm 145:4 says:

"One generation shall praise Your works to another,

and shall declare Your mighty acts."

Deuteronomy 6 is one of my favorite passages.  Right after talking about how you should teach God's statutes to your children when you lie down, sit at the table, walk along the way, etc., it says:

"Then it shall come about when the Lord your God brings you into the land which He swore to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to give you, great and splendid cities, which you did not build, and houses full of good things which you did not fill, and hewn cisterns which you did not dig, vineyards and olive trees which you did not plant, and you eat and are satisfied."

None of us had anything to do with what we are reaping.  We are so blessed!

It makes me think of the song - "May All Who Come Behind Us Find Us Faithful."  A few words from that song - 

...Those who've gone before us lined the way

Cheering on the faithful

encouraging the weary

Their lives a stirring testament to God's sustaining grace

...let us leave to those behind us

the heritage of faithfulness passed on through godly lives

Oh, may all who come behind us find us faithful.

May the power of our devotion light the way

May the footprints that we leave

Lead them to believe

And the lives we live inspire them to obey

Oh, may all who come behind us find us faithful.

However, every generation must make their faith their own.  More specifically, every person must make their faith their own in order to enter heaven.  I believe we have established the "success" of EHBC.  (I read part of an article at this point, but I think I shall leave that out here!)  I realize that I am talking to mature Christians, but I think sometimes we slide down to a different chair.

I'm sure most are familiar with the concept of the "3 Chairs."  I think it may have originated with Bruce Wilkerson.  I found several different versions online, so I have tweaked it accordingly.

Everyone is in a chair, although sometimes we migrate.

Where you're seated is important.

This summer our family is going to the Sight & Sound Theater in PA.  I just recently purchased the tickets and was able to choose our seats.  They have a neat feature.  You can click on the seat and it will show a picture of what the stage looks like from that seat.  If you're "into" attending sporting events, plays, concerts, you know that where you sit is important!

The first chair is Commitment.

This is a personal walk with the Lord.

The second chair is Compromise.

Those in this chair claim an association with Christ, probably claim a decision, but their commitment has faded.  Their actions and beliefs are associated more with who they are with.  

The third chair is Complacency.  

The unsaved are seated in this chair.  They are comfortable with no space for Christ.

Joshua 24 talks about choosing who you will serve.  It is easy to piggyback on my godly heritage. Growing up it seemed that everyone knew my Grampie and my Gram and my parents.  I felt like we had a good name.   I know I have my own faith, and I know that you know you have your own faith, but given such a "goodly" heritage, we sometimes fall back on it.  I cannot live off the glow of a goodly church or a goodly family.

You know, it is very easy to get warm fuzzies coming here.

~Little red aprons:  Kathy Smith did an AMAZING job with this!  Every year she would have a Valentine's Day banquet for couples in the church and we girls got to be the waitresses.

~Walking around the pole at the bottom of the stairs, in my church shoes.

~Mother-Daughter Banquets!  Oh my!  This was before Pinterest & the internet!  How did they come up with these amazing ideas!?   One year I won the door prize and got to pick a doll quilt which I still have!

However, a Sparky crown full of jewels doesn't place me in the first chair.  I am guilty.  The 3 Chairs are convicting to me.  

?How many communions go by at church and I am confessing the same sins, month after month, sometimes year after year, with seemingly no growth?

?How many days in a row does my Bible sit unopened?

In order to Be the Story and Tell the Story we need to Know the Story, but even that can be tricky. Knowledge puffs up and we have been blessed at EHBC with so much knowledge.  I have all the college credits for a Bible degree - hours and hours of learning doctrine and Pauline epistles and prophecy.  But we cannot live off past victories.

Last week our pastor challenged us to share the gospel with one person that week.  Simple enough, right?

It's been 2 years since I have led someone to the Lord, and even if I were to count up everyone I have every led to the Lord, it wouldn't be such a big number.

It has been 4 months since I have clearly and fully explained my faith and what I believe to an unbeliever.

Yes, there have been mission trips and lots of time spent teaching kids.  I am not talking about a works-oriented faith, but a sold-out-to-Jesus and follower-not-a-fan type commitment.

It reminds me of the song "I Want to Leave a Legacy."  I do, but not for legacy's sake.  Here are a few of the words:

...But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides the temporary trappings of this world.

I want to leave a legacy.

How will they remember me?

Did I choose to love?

Did I point to You enough to make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering.

Child of mercy & grace who blessed Your name, unapologetically, and leave that kind of legacy...

We have been given a goodly heritage.  

It follows then, that we are responsible to leave a goodly heritage.

Everyone here, (that night), is an aunt, a parent, a grandparent, a "caring adult" in someone's life.

EHBC has been "successful" with helping to raise up children into young adults who love the Lord and continue to serve Him.  That is wonderful and I do believe that the "special sauce" of faithful past generations and the three things mentioned before have a lot to do with that.  But I don't want to leave out the home.

In true form, I will take issue a bit with the theme of a lighthouse.  :)  

"The role of the church is not to just make sure that as you look down on this community you can see the light shining bright from our facility.  The role of the church is to make sure the light is shining in each and every home so the community can be lit for the world to see."

I think I'll exchanged the idea of a lighthouse, although the church certainly is that, with the idea of a power source, a recharger, a place to plug in and re-focus on God, connect with Him, and a place that equips the home.  Not just feeding the family but teaching them to feed themselves.  

This brings me to Faith at Home, which is my heartbeat.

Did you know that in a study of 7-12th graders, when they were asked who is the most significant religious influence in their lives they chose 

Mother

Father

Grandparent

Another relative

Siblings

and Friends ALL before "Pastor" and "Sunday School Teacher", etc.

"While the approach of 'dropping the kids off at church' may keep them busy at church for a few years, it often doesn't lead to faith that lasts into their adult years.  From 65-90% of kids active in high school youth groups do not go to church by the time they are sophomores in college.  One third will never return.  The reason these kids don't return to church is b/c their faith hasn't been firmly established and lived out in their homes.  Many of them view faith as something hypocritical - parents act one way at church & a completely different way at home."

Reggie Joiner is a speaker & author.  He says that parents typically have over 3,000 hours per year of unscheduled time with their children while the church has about 200.  

I am suggesting that we encourage one another.  We pass one a goodly, godly heritage.  

Sit in the first chair,

with baton in hand.

You would think that I had pretty much everything I needed in my arsenal.  Christian home, Christian education.  That's pretty prideful, right?  One of the biggest encouragements I have had was from my friend, Susan.  She encouraged me when my kids were quite small that they could be having their own daily devotions.  Thank you, Susan!  And so they have, since they were about 5, 7 & 8.  This is not to say that we are some kind-of great & perfect family.  Spend 5 minutes with us or friend me on facebook and you will see that this is not true!  However, we are intentional.

On the way up, (to Hodgdon that day), I was listening to Rush Limbaugh.  

He was talking about a family that groomed their son to be a football player.  I imagine that boy had a football by the time he was 1 or 2 years old.  He probably spend weekends playing catch with his dad.  His family took him to games, started him in pee-wee football and taught him the ins and outs of the game.  Imagine the time, energy & effort they spent grooming him to be a football player.

That is how intentional we need to be with the spiritual heritage we are giving our children/special kids in our lives.